What does solo travel really feel like? 5 emotions every traveller experiences

Let’s be honest, solo travelling can be intimidating: you’re not really sure what to expect and you don’t always trust yourself that you will be able to problem solve alone. But on the other side of it there is a huge amount of accomplishment waiting for you, if you dare to leave your comfort zone. If you’re thinking about doing a solo trip, but not really sure what to expect, or you’ve tried travelling alone but not sure how you feel about it, this post is for you. I have collected 5 feelings that you may experience during times when travelling alone, and why these feelings are completely valid and normal. Obviously, this is based on my experience and what I’ve learnt/heard from other travellers regarding the topic, so take it with a pinch of salt. 

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1. Feeling like you should have never done this in the first place 

As much as I love solo travelling, there are moments even in my life, when I ask myself the simple question: why the f*ck would you do this alone? But then I always receive opportunities where I experience so much growth and happiness, simply coming from being able to say: I did this all alone, that make up for the moments of doubt. Just like in any other area in your life there will be times when you question your decisions, travelling is no exception. That’s why I think it’s good to keep a written journal/note of your commitment, an actual reminder of what you can gain out of being able to say it out loud: I can do this alone. You will need something to rely on to commit to your goals when life forces you to doubt yourself. 

2. Feeling so much happiness that you wish you could share with someone in that minute (and feeling like sending a photo or voice note is just not the same): 

Sometimes what you feel in the moment cannot be replicated. No matter how many photos or videos you take, how well you describe the experience, not being able to share it in real life may bring you all sorts of emotions. Which is a strange feeling because you equally experience so much joy and emptiness in your heart, you may get overwhelmed. This is expected, we are humans and sharing is engraved in our brains. Even if you’re kind of mad at someone you love, when you see something that you know they would appreciate too it feels a little empty to experience it without them. What I like to remind myself in moments like this, is that we have to honour our choices. I think this is something a lot of people struggle with, everyone always wants to be in multiple places at multiple times, instead of making the most of a given moment. If you decided to travel alone there must have been a reason you did it in the first place. Remind yourself of that goal, and honour your decisions. Maybe it was because no one you know was available to travel with you, but you were eager to see the world. You prioritised travelling over waiting at home to have someone to go with you, so focus on honouring the decision you made! I also like to remind myself that when we are apart from others, we tend to romanticise what it would be like travelling with them. The 'what if' theories always happen to be more positive and rosy in our heads, but in reality having to travel with someone isn't always as easy or smooth as we'd like to think. It comes with a lot of compromises, when you're alone you get to do whatever you want.

3. Feeling like not socialising and wanting to protect your energy 

Okay, we need to talk about the downside of hostels/shared accommodations for a minute because energy vampires can show up, not just in your everyday life, but also when you travel. I think the hostel culture sometimes pressures travellers to be super sociable and hang out 24/7. I have definitely come across people who try to make you feel like you’re missing out, and not making the most of your trip. But if you’re more introverted, or simply find that the people where you’re staying are not your vibe, it is normal that you rather do something alone and protect your energy. Just because you like to keep an open mind, it doesn’t mean you have to be around people all the time. You can say no to invitations to have dinner or drinks, especially if the energy does not feel right or aligned with your plans/social battery. I sometimes like to ask myself the following: would I put any energy into this conversation if I was talking to the same person back home? If the answer is no, I will find a polite way to protect my peace. 

4. Feeling like even though it wasn’t always easy, you’d do it all again  

You know how they say that when you look back everything seems more positive? That definitely applies to solo travel. Like I discussed in point 1, there may come moments when you doubt why you even considered travelling alone in the first place. But once you stepped outside of your comfort zone and have a sense of accomplishment a new feeling will appear: wanting to experience it all over again! 

5. …or feeling like you never want to travel alone again.

I think establishing what you don’t want can be just as important as knowing what you want. But the truth is, you will never know whether solo travelling is for you until you tried. You may feel like this isn’t for you after the first inconvenience. That is totally normal. But I would encourage you to take a deep breath in this case, and give yourself a minute to think and feel. Even if you are experiencing negative emotions, it is important to sit with them for a second. You may feel annoyed that you spent so much money, time and effort on this trip and now you realised you don’t really enjoy travelling alone. That is fine, the first step is always recognising the issue. This is a lesson you’re learning right now; maybe solo travelling isn’t really for you. At least you can say you’ve tried and gave it a proper go. This is also a lesson learnt, and an important one of that. And remember, solo travelling can be done in different ways and doses. If you’re craving time alone while travelling with others, you can always do an experience alone here and there. You don’t have to go fully solo, just make some time during the day for an activity that you can do alone, for example going for a morning walk with a coffee in hand or visiting a museum alone. This can be the perfect mix that gives you a sense of freedom but also comfort. 

Remember, solo travelling is a beautiful way to get to know yourself, your abilities and limits better. It should be an expansive and empowering experience, and how it’s done really is up to you.